Dear Joy and John Paul,
On the way home from the store today, we were pushing naptime and I had a grumpy 14-month-old as a result. Not even his new Hot Wheels could console him (“a CAH!”). All I could hear was whining and fussing. So I reached for the one thing that has reliably calmed Eli down every single time: Barton Hollow. I skipped to “Poison and Wine” because that is his favorite. And what do I hear? Nothing but your dulcet tones, as Eli spent the remainder of the car ride smiling to himself in his car seat.
“Poison and Wine” was the song that made me buy Barton Hollow without listening to a single second of it. I had loved “P&W” so much on the EP that I stayed up until 12:01 am the day BH came out to download it as soon as possible. I loved BH too. In fact, it and Over the Rhine’s The Long Surrender were really the only two albums that I listened to during 2011. I actually had to burn myself a second copy of BH because I wore out my first copy (thank goodness for digital downloads!).
Six months later, I was four months pregnant and starting to feel the baby kick. That kid was a mover and a shaker, particularly when Barton Hollow was playing. For the remainder of my pregnancy if I ever got worried that Eli hadn’t moved in awhile I just turned on “P&W” and there he was, dancing away. A good friend puts on a “best albums of the year” party in mid-December; Eli just hung out calmly until “P&W” came on and then everyone watched my belly moving in and out as he tried to punch his way closer to your voices.
When Eli was first born, he couldn’t figure out breastfeeding. Lots of things conspired to make it very difficult for him – and me. We actually left the hospital without him ever latching on correctly. When we arrived at home, he was crying and crying because he was hungry and I just couldn’t figure out how to teach him to nurse. So I was crying and crying too. I needed to put something on that calms me down, so “P&W” it was. Eli stopped crying, listened for a bit, and then latched right on and ate his first good meal. Until he consistently had it figured out, I just put BH on repeat and he’d eat away.
Eli was colicky too, and I had severe postpartum depression and anxiety. Needless to say, there was a lot of crying and not a lot of sleeping. But you know what worked every single time I put it on? “Poison and Wine.” Every time. Nights when I put that song on repeat were the ones when Eli and I got the best sleep. (This, of course, begs the question of why I didn’t do that EVERY night. I guess I’m dumb sometimes.) And that’s why the play count on my iPod looks like this:
(And that’s not counting all the plays on the cd and the other 58 times on iTunes…)
Actual times when I have played “P&W” to calm Eli include:
- when I couldn’t make a sandwich fast enough to suit him: your music is better than food.
- when we were in the emergency room because he was in respiratory distress: it calmed him enough to be able to do his breathing treatments effectively: your music is better than corticosteroids.
- when I needed him to be still for a diaper change even though he had a painful, blistery diaper rash from antibiotics: your music is better than Tylenol and zinc oxide and oatmeal baths.
- when his ears were hurting him so much that he couldn’t sleep, I put him in the baby carrier on my chest with the iPod tucked into the pocket: your music is better than stuffed animals and warm blankets.
- when we took Eli’s first plane flight and he was sleep-deprived and tired, I sang the song myself – for two hours – and he went from that screaming child that everyone prays won’t be sitting next to them to the angelic baby who everyone doesn’t mind at all sitting next to them: your music is better than earplugs for an entire plane full of people, even if I’m the one singing it.
Bottom line is this. I have listened to “Poison and Wine” well over one thousand times – more than two and a half days of my life – and I still love it, and so does my son. Barton Hollow saved our lives: seriously. I would not have made it through the first year of Eli’s life without you. And now that I have an ace up my sleeve for any and all issues involving Eli being upset? I cannot tell you how much it means to know that Barton Hollow is always going to be there. Come hell or high water – and I’ve been through both so far with your music – your voices will be there to remind Eli and I of what grace means.
So thank you both. From the bottom of my heart, for being a gift to me and my family, you have my deepest and most sincere gratitude. You are welcome in our home for the remainder of our lives, wherever we may be. I’ll bake you cookies and Eli will show you his cars. And his ducks.
With love,
Bethany and Eli
P.S. Just so you know, it’s not just familiar music of yours that Eli likes. When The Hunger Games soundtrack came out, and now that the soundtrack for A Place at the Table has been released, I played your new songs for Eli. He stopped fidgeting and griping and sat still, just listening and grinning like a fool. So we join many, many others in praying and hoping that the two of you aren’t finished collaborating yet. And how can you possibly say no to this face? He loves you so much. We both do.
